(no subject)

[allthelifethereis]

He finds himself in a routine. He's got the other Losers, a handful of friends his own age besides. He gets laid occasionally. He works on his book. He teaches classes. He grades. He's managed to track down a handful of his books, and they're stored on a bookshelf that's well on its way to being stuffed. It's not a bad sort of life.

Not long after he'd arrived, he'd had keys cut for the Losers, all of them. He'd wanted them to know that is apartment was a safe place. That, no matter what, he'd be there if needs them.

So far, he hasn't regretted that decision.
He settles down on the couch, reading submissions for the back to back workshops he has in the morning, a beer open at his elbow.

Comments

[eddie_spaghetti]

"I lived in New York?" Eddie said, eyes widening. His mom had always talked about how dangerous the city was, and he had to wonder if he'd moved there to spite her, somehow.

"I know. I wouldn't... I wouldn't do that."

At thirteen, there was no way in hell that he could've kept his trap shut, especially to Richie, but he'd learned that sometimes you just had to keep secrets, because they weren't yours to tell.

[allthelifethereis]

"You were definitely working in Manhattan," he says. "I don't know if you and your wife lived there, but you definitely drove to Derry." He takes another sip of his beer, almost reflective, and then goes back to picking at the label with his thumbnail. "So we all go back to Darrow and we meet up at a Chinese restaurant - had dinner, a few beers." He frowns his dark eyebrows pulling together. "Stan wasn't there -- w-we didn't even remember him till the end."

[eddie_spaghetti]

Okay.

Okay, maybe this was a mistake. It suddenly didn't seem fair that he might know more about Stan's life, than Stan knew about his own, especially if that meant...

Eddie wanted to believe that Stan had simply chosen not to come. That he'd said to hell with all of them, and stayed comfortable and safe wherever he'd landed after Derry, but...

"Wait a minute, my wife?"

[allthelifethereis]

Bill's got no intention of telling Eddie everything that happened with Stan -- not before he tells Stan, and hopefully that's a story that he'll never have to tell to anyone. He's almost glad when Eddie's attention darts away.

"Yeah, wife," he says, smirking. "Her name was...Shit. What was it? Mara? Marta?" He clicks his fingers. "Myra."

[eddie_spaghetti]

"Ugh, I don't want to know," he decided, flinging himself dramatically against the couch cushions behind him.

"What about Richie?" He blurted, immediately regretting the question. Bill hadn't been around for all the stuff with the kissing bridge last year. Maybe he didn't even know that Richie liked boys, and Eddie knew how shitty it would be of him to spill a secret like that, even to Bill.

[allthelifethereis]

Bill smiles at that, reminded of Richie's Jabba the Hutt impression. "Richie? Still single. Still a dick." He smiles warmer. "Doing stand up comedy for a living."

[eddie_spaghetti]

"What, did he finally get funny?" Eddie grinned, feeling kind of relieved that it still felt okay to give Richie shit, even if Bill was... kind of a different Bill now.

The smile dropped away from his face, and he said, "But it was bad, right? Going back down into the sewers."

[allthelifethereis]

God, he doesn't want to be telling this story. He takes a fortifying sip of his beer and then nods.

"Yeah," he says. "It was as bad as the first time." He pauses, his eyebrows drawing together in a frown. "Worse."

[eddie_spaghetti]

"Okay," Eddie said, leaning back against the couch with an unsteady sigh. "Maybe I shouldn't... don't know, I feel like I shouldn't know any more, if the rest of the guys don't. I just... I don't know, Bill. You're so different. Not, like, in a bad way, it's just—"

He shrugged awkwardly.

"Sometimes it feels like you're looking at us like we're ghosts. Or like we're not completely real. I get it, I guess. It just kind of sucks."

[allthelifethereis]

Bill nods, pushing one hand back through his hair. More than anything, he doesn't want to be the one to tell Eddie the rest of this story. He desperately wants to keep it unsaid.

"I'm sorry about that," he says, gently. "I can't always help it. It's been a long time since i saw you guys this way, remember..."

[eddie_spaghetti]

"I know that, Bill. It's fucking weird. For all of us," Eddie admitted, somehow sulking deeper into the cushions.

"It must be really weird. I mean, you're the only one. I wonder why."

[allthelifethereis]

Bill shrugs at that, turning his beer bottle in his hands. "I don't know, man," he says. "Why does this place do anything it does, right? Maybe someone somewhere just wanted to fuck with me."